Inside the Mind of Depressive Suicide: A Gimpy Monologue

 

English: On-Air Project #116-4 from the Series...
English: On-Air Project #116-4 from the Series of “Monologue of Ice” by ATTA KIM (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

I wish I could show you what it was like,
that every day I wake up with such fight.
The voices of the past that I thought that,
they fill my soul with an overwhelming dread.
The voices shout to me with an ever-increasing agony.
And I wonder then in despair if they shall be permanently with me.
Removing the visions of corpses and results in suicide, and my own personal shame.
I wonder often as it will come a day when I will feel just the same,
same as everyone else, they seem to drift in and out.
Never contemplating the importance of their lives, nor what it’s all about.
But at the same time, feel his hands creeping up on me,
the ghost of a long dead best friend returned from the grave to inhabit my mind and to violate me once more.
His hands cold and forceful as if for some reason there is an uneven score.
In the apex of my life, my youth has slipped away
as many dead friends of those twice my age, I’m hoping for a better day.
Hoping that I don’t slipped into deaths cold embrace.
Praying that I don’t make the mistake of causing my family both pain and disgrace.
And yet I know that one day I slipped,
and I find my walls in the coat of newly painted red,
I made a mistake, when that regret.
You see? I’ve ended up dead

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One thought on “Inside the Mind of Depressive Suicide: A Gimpy Monologue

  1. I always miss you. Moot point, I know.

    Okay, moving on…Don’t kill yourself. Seriously. I just figured out the perfect way to capitalize on being disabled, and if you kill yourself you won’t get filthy rich like I’m planning on doing.

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