What kind of person you are: A Gimpy Monologue

When I was a kid, people used to tell me that I was born different because God wanted me to be. They said that I had a special message. Now, I’m 31 years old, and if I did have a message to bear, I’ve probably long since forgotten what it is. But sometimes when I’m alone, I reached back into the darker corners of my mind, the corners where men dare not travel. Couldn’t find message. Only this piece, only these thoughts. I don’t know if my disability is a gift or not, sometimes I feel like it’s a curse. It’s a curse that many bear though, the curse of difference, of not belonging, and loneliness. I’m probably the worst hermetic messenger since, well, Hermes. He got his wires crossed a lot, didn’t he? So instead of giving you a message from up above, the fine and wizened wine of the great divine, I’m going to give you a message from right here… Right from the heart.

If you wonder if you’re a good person, think of how you normally look at people like me. Are you patronizing or condescending? Do you blame divine providence for putting good people like me in bad situations? That probably has a lot more to do with you, than it does with me. Do you ever find yourself wondering if someone’s looking, while you’re helping me with something that might be embarrassing? Do you wonder what they think? You ever find yourself saying, that if you were in my position you don’t know if you could do it? Well let me leave you with a simple thought, you can interpret this last statement however you like, I promise I’ll try not to judge you more harshly than you judge me. But if you don’t know if you could put yourself in my position, that tells me exactly what kind of person you are, you need not wonder anymore.

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